Caroline Myss'
True Story Of Marnie

In Caroline Myss' book, "Anatomy of the Spirit," she devotes several chapters to inner transformation, the Dark Night of the Soul and our spiritual awakening. All are intimately related. Even though the Dark Night is a true blessing, it can be difficult to understand and accept as one endures the experience. 

Carolyn Myss describes the process of spiritual awakening so well "There is nothing easy about becoming conscious." And she is right.

In the spiritual crisis section of her book, she tells a true story about a young woman named Marnie. It is a wonderful and very inspiring example of a Dark Night experience that happened to a very courageous individual. Always remember that the Dark Night can come in various sizes and shapes. And they will never be bigger or smaller than what we are prepared to cope with. Marnie's was a big one. I've summarized it below...

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Marnie was a young social worker in Scotland when a seven-year, Dark Night crisis unexpectedly entered her life. At the age of thirty she came down with a mysterious medical condition that doctors could not diagnose or explain.

With each passing month, Marnie developed increasing pain throughout her body. Eventually, it became so severe that she was forced to take a leave of absence from her job. For two more years, she went from doctor to doctor for a cure but nothing worked.

Not surprisingly, Marnie went into deep depression. Her friends suggested she try alternative medicine and gave her books to read on the subject. One of those books was about Sai Baba, a spiritual master living in India.

After six more months of pain, Marnie decided to travel to India and spend time at the ashram of Sai Baba hoping to get an audience with this Master. For some reason, it never fell into place. She returned to Scotland in deep despair. Soon thereafter she started having a series of dreams in which a voice kept asking her "can you accept what I have given you?"

After brushing off the dreams as meaningless, a friend suggested she treat them as though she were being asked a spiritual question with a higher meaning and purpose to it. Out of desperation she decided to give it a try.

The next time she had the dream she answered the question by saying, in her dream, "Yes, I will accept what you have given me." She was immediately bathed in a white light and for the first time in years was pain free. Upon awakening, she hoped the pain would still be gone, but it wasn't. Incredibly, the pain got worse over the next four years!

During those four years, she held onto the dream and its message as best she could even though her life was filled with anger and despair wondering why she was suffering for no good reason. And yet, she wouldn't quit believing that God was helping her.

One night, while in deep despair and tears, Marnie said she finally reached surrender. She thought she had reached it before but had not.

Looking back she explained that, since having the dream four years ago, she really hadn't accepted the Dark Night crisis that had become a part of her life for so long. Rather, she was in resignation to it and was still fighting and resisting the test that had been brought into her life. But this time, she had reached the end. There was no more resistance, no more fight, and she finally surrendered and let go completely. All she said to God was "Whatever you choose for me, so be it. Just give me the strength."  

As soon as she surrendered, she felt her pain ease and her hands filled with heat. She immediately "knew" that this was no ordinary heat, but a spiritual heat that had the power to help heal others.

At the time of this writing, Marine was forty-four. She is respected the world over as a genuine and greatly loved anointed healer. Amazingly, she has not been able to heal her own pain, although it has eased a bit. In her own words "I would go through it all again, given who I am today and what I know, for the privilege of helping others the way I can now."

Marnie's remarkable story is one of many. If you are going through a spiritual crisis, regardless of size and intensity, the end will come when you surrender and accept what our Source has done to help awaken you on the path. And you will do so with joy, not resignation, in your heart. Then you must live it. Then you will finally understand.

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Here is an inspirational quote I have cited several times in this web site and would like to present it again because of the wisdom it contains...

"You cannot hope to grow spiritually unless you are prepared to change. Those changes may come in small ways to begin with, but as you move further and further into the new, they will become more drastic and vital. Sometimes it needs a complete upheaval to bring about a new way of life."

Given to Eileen Caddy... by God
Flight Into Freedom (1988)


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